Autumnal Swingate.

Just this really.

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Parking Like A Twat in Stevenage.

When I started this blog way back in 2008 I thought I would be the only person taking an interest in the parking habits of those in and around Stevenage. How wrong I was. Since that time, a Facebook group has sprung up – Parking Like A Twat in Stevenage – an event so improbable, I thought I’d dreamt the whole thing up. Can we be twinned somehow?

School pick up time and this bellend decides to park so accurately.......twat.

“School pick up time and this bellend decides to park so accurately……. twat.”

But no, it’s real – and the photos are genuinely taken in Stevenage. Even Swingate gets in on the act. Not that this part of the world has a monopoly on twatty parking, but it’s rare for someone to not only set up a group so geographically specific, but for others to contribute – pretty regularly as it turns out. Stevenage is not short of people who park like twats. We bring forth exhibits B, C and D.

Could not believe this woman!! Swung her car in like its normal space, didn't care that it was sticking out on a bend!! She grabbed a big trolley so guessing she wasn't just popping in for a pint of milk! Gives woman drivers a bad name!!! Billy hunt!

“Could not believe this woman!! Swung her car in like its normal space, didn’t care that it was sticking out on a bend!! She grabbed a big trolley so guessing she wasn’t just popping in for a pint of milk! Gives woman drivers a bad name!!! Billy hunt!”

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Amazing. Having started on Facebook in June 2013, it already has 4,959 Likes – that’s about 4,959 more than Parking In Stevenage. Hats off to them. I for one will be parking with added care, knowing that this community is watching…

I don’t know much about art, but I do know these need a little context.

Stop stop stop stop stop! I need to caveat this. Since writing what’s below, I’ve discovered that this is the work of St Francis students in Letchworth. It’s a good school with an impressive theatre. Really, you’d never think a school would have a theatre of its own that’s so well-appointed. So, I’m hoping even the parents concerned might agree that in the grand scheme of the history of art, there are better examples than this. Is this the reason First Capital Connect lost their franchise?

I applaud the use of the community to help bring some colour to what could be a dreary environment (though I do question why a Stevenage school wasn’t asked to supply the art). That being the case, would it not be apt for whoever arranged this to give these artworks some context and recognition to the students behind them so people can appreciate then a little more. Otherwise, people tend to think the worst. Myself included. So here’s what I wrote in my ‘ignorant phase’.

I’m trying not to offend. I’m not an art critic but I’m about to criticise some art – in the very loose sense of the word.

A short while ago, Stevenage station underwent a bit of a makeover. Very nice tiling all around. A real breath of fresh air – tarted up the place no end. Then someone had the bright idea of breaking up all this lovely tile-work with some culture. So here we see what I can only imagine is specially-commissioned ‘art’ for the station.

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Someone has deliberately done this with the authorities’ permission. Or have they? Would everyone else assume someone else gave permission for this to go up?

There’s a handshake growing out of a path with a park bench with Mr Benn on it. Then there’s a tree and office block growing out of another hand. Not to mention the isometric train up on one rail or some people in black morph suits playing dangerously next to the unguarded tracks.

I hate to be harsh in case the person that did this is really proud of what they created. Is it a competition winner? Someone really young? Or ill? It’s hard to say. But this commuter doesn’t think they’re very good. At all.

I’ll leave it there.

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Is Elon Musk parked up in Swingate?

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You’d expect a Tesla really…

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